I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
