Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
