so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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