somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
