Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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