i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Randomize
