I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
