Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
