Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize