I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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