I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
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