don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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