If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
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