How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize
