The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
