they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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