so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
