nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
