you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize