i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
