And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
