Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
