well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
