Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
