I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
