Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
