Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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