holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
