Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
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