on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
sex in a hospital.. check
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
