I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
