and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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