You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
He better not be in your backpack
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
