Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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