me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
