Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
