Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
