windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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