we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
