If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
