Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Well I just put wine in my tea
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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