Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Damn victory sex feels great
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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