Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
