Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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