how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
