stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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