Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
they're like a gay fantastic four
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
