didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
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