I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
