Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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