i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
bring money and cleavage
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
